Day 213 - Ya, I Did It.

Today my challenge was to break through ‘foreboding’ and live the word ‘DETERMINED’, and ya, I did it!

This is the recap of ‘how it went’ from my last blog: Naked Face, Facing Naked Truth
https://steemit.com/life/@kimzilla/naked-face-facing-naked-truth

I started out the day feeling like it was going to be a bad day, already squirming at the thought of going back to work. I traced the experience back to childhood, understood it, cleared it with some self-forgiveness, and decided how I was going to move forward. And that is exactly what I did. Man, these tools are amazing!

I made a list of things I had to or wanted to get done. I also included on that list something nice for me (manicure!), and I did everything except one thing. The thing I resist most. I left it out and did not accomplish that, but I will leave the details of that for another blog.

I used the word determined to live today, and I did it in such a way that was practical, wherein at every fork in the proverbial road, I stood as the determining factor. Instead of growing anxious about a decision and going into self-doubt, procrastination or avoidance, I took a moment to make a choice with confidence and used determination to see it through.

At the end of the day today, I can look back on the day and feel satisfied: today I supported myself, today was a good investment into the rest of my life.

To make an investment into YOUR life, take a moment to check out the following resources, but be careful.... it might change your life!

SOUL –  The School of Ultimate Living is an online community of people interested in
discovering and developing their utmost potential
eqafe.com – Invest in a wide range of Interviews and Support yourself to Self Perfection
Journey To Life Blogs – Read the blogs from those walking the 7 year journey to life.
Self and Living – Practical Living Support To Live to Your Utmost Potential
DIP Lite – Free Online Course to get you started with learning the Tools of Self Support
DIP PRO -A Desteni Course for those Ready to Walk the Journey of a Lifetime

Day 207 - Waking Up Fearless

I work at a fast paced job in the financial industry. There is a lot of pressure, there is a lot of responsibility, and when dealing with other people's money, there is a lot on the line. No one would ever guess it of me, but sometimes I wake up in the morning finding it exceptionally difficult to snap out of moods I wake up in. These moods can and do usually have an impact on my entire day, making the day, the work, the interactions less-than was potentially possible.

On the advice of Sunette, from Self&Living Youtube channel, I have begun to question this; am I a victim to my mood? Am I helpless to the experience I wake up with in the morning? Is my entire day pre-programmed based on the first few seconds of my day? What about my agency, my self-will, and my ability to choose?

I have been testing out a challenge for about a month now, where I take a moment in the morning to define the way I feel, in words, in writing. Once I have the words, I then choose support words to live that day. After even the very first day I was astounded to find out that this is incredible! In this simple act I have made such a huge change! Instead of being enslaved to experiences like 'stuck', 'defeated' and 'restless', I get to live words of MY choice, 'release', 'achieve', and 'focused.'

This has been a personal process for me so far, but it has been so beneficial to me that I now intend on sharing it, starting with today.

Today is the third day of my vacation. I'm staying in a chalet, snowboarding for the week. In these first three days, without the pressure and stress from my job pushing me to move forward, I have fallen into a slump. I have found myself resistant to even get up and get out on the hill. It's like my entire body is saying "no, do nothing, stay in bed all day, no structure, don't move forward!".

          This can be cool at times, but I have been doing this for two days straight and now, I am ready to get up and go and break through the resistance.

 

The experience I have this morning, when defined in words is 'fear'. It's like I have developed this fear of moving myself into something new. As if I am in-FEAR-ior to the thoughts I can create about how the day will go. I think of all the bad and negative, like "it will be cold", and "the conditions are icy", "I won't enjoy myself like I would just lounging around", and I project myself reacting in discomfort and fearful anxiety.

This is a recipe for a crappy, sub-par day and living experience.

But right here is where I give myself agency.

The support word I choose for myself today is 'fearless'. I will define this with an emphasis on going forth fully into experience, allowing myself to have fun, make mistakes, fall, and ENJOY.

I stand equal to my thoughts and projection, placing myself in a position of self control. I am not a victim, I am the creator of me.

Already i can feel a shift within me, where it's like a weight has been slightly lifted by the simple act of giving myself a little direction, and permission to break free from a cycle, habit or pattern I would have normally fallen into.

At the end of the day I will give a recap on how I lived the words I gave to myself, whether it was a success or requires adjustment, and I will talk about what i learned from walking into my day within and as 'fearlessness'!

Check out the video from Se;f & Living that inspired me to begin this process of changing me upon waking up:

Who Did I Wake Up As This Morning?