"These three women are high in the air, playful and free, yet alert and interdependent. In a trapeze act, nobody can afford to be a little bit "absent" even for a split second. And it is this quality of total attentiveness to the moment at hand that is represented here.
We may feel there are too many things to do at once, but get bogged down in trying to do a bit here, a bit there, instead of taking one task at a time and getting on with it. Or perhaps we think our task is "boring" because we've forgotten that it's not what you do but how you do it that matters.
Developing the knack of being total in responding to whatever comes, as it comes, is one of the greatest gifts you can give yourself. Taking one step through life at a time, giving each step your complete attention and energy, can bring a wondrous new vitality and creativity to all that you do."
The question I held within me while pulling this card involves the emotional experience I woke up into yesterday. I managed to direct my day despite the experience, yet it was persistent and came back at night, right as I was getting ready for sleep. I reminded myself not to engage with it, just to feel it. I saw the temptation of thinking and connecting the experience to thoughts and wonderings, but I simply felt it and let it be.
When I woke up today, it came back, and I realized this was premenstrual syndrome activating within me. This is where I become very aware of my emotional body and feel it quite extensively for about a week. This emotional body is always there, but it is placed in the forefront of my awareness during this time. I used to see this as a curse, but I have changed my perspective to look at it as a blessing, as I get to see, examine and direct these experiences directly during this time.
So, my question was: "How can I best support myself when dealing with an intense emotional experience over a period of time" (rather than in fleeting moments)?
I am able to derive much support from this card, because I see that if I remain vigilant, alert and attentive, I can direct the experience throughout the entire week. I simply need to take what I did last night, and apply in in every moment. I am familiar with this 'alertness' or 'attentiveness', I can recall living this word when driving in a snow storm or during a busy and pressing time at work. What I need to do now is expand myself as this word, into my moment-to-moment living.
To support myself, i will create a structure for the day, meaning, I will decide a couple of tasks to do to define and organize my time, and to give myself chunks of time to work with to break up the day into sections. This way, I will know very clearly what is the task at hand, so that when it becomes difficult, I can remind myself where my focus and attention should be, and I will move myself according to my plan (remaining flexible, of course), and not go into the wallowing experience that can throw me off track in a moment of 'absentness'.
Within this, a focus on breath and movement is crucial, as well as going easy on myself and even finding some enjoyment within what I am doing.
Daily writing has been an unbelievable support, because the points I have uncovered and began walking this past two weeks will play a big role in the self-support I will be able to live for myself. I am so grateful for the tools of writing and corrective application, as it not only prevents unpleasant consequences in my life, but also assists and supports me to enjoy myself more in my daily life.
I will walk my correction today and report back any findings, obstacles or triumphs.
Thanks for reading!
Note: I am walking a process of self-change using the tools of support offered by www.Desteni.org. I am taking the course called DIP Pro. In this course I learn how to take every day moments and find ways to make myself a better, more understanding and well rounded human being, the kind of human being I would like to see in this world. "Be the change you want to see" is a cool saying, but actually doing it is a bit more confusing because people tend to believe that you can't change human nature. I believe you can, because I have seen myself changing to someone I've always wanted to be. Not there yet, but my motivation is fueled by the proof I have given to myself, which I have documented online every sep of the way, in my blogs and on youtube. DIP Pro requires serious dedication and commitment, it is ot for the faint of heart. If you want to test the waters for yourself, try the Lite version, it's called DIP Lite, and the best part is, it's free! Why? Because Desteni puts individual self-change above profit. Why does DIP Pro cost money? Because it costs money to exist in this world, and takes a dedicated team to run the program. Otherwise it would also be free.