Look Inside to Self for Guidance

“Look inside to Self for guidance” follows “be silent always – take a breath before you speak”.  Please read the following blogs for context:

Be Silent Always (When is Silence Real?) 

Be Silent Always (2)

 Take a Breath Before You Speak 

Take a Breath Before You Speak (2) 

 

When you look inside to SELF for guidance, which ‘Self’ are you looking to? The self-interested self, or the Self that stands within responsibility, that stands within principle, within integrity, within respect, the one that stands as what is Best for All?

Can you stand as the Tree of Life that gives unconditionally, expecting nothing in return?

Can you stand as responsibility, taking SELF-responsibility and taking responsibility for your environment as an extension of yourself?  Responsibility leaves no time for self-interest.

Can you give as you would like to receive, without first receiving?

It is vitally important to first learn how to be silent always – because as soon as your mind becomes busy, you are already in self-interest. Within this, you cannot trust yourSELF to guide you, because you are living as a ‘self’ that is out for its own gain. This means that anything that comes from this self will be a manipulation, seeking profits and avoiding losses. Seeking positive experience and avoiding negative experience. Within this, self disregards everything in one’s reality as ‘self’ becomes the center of the universe, not seeing and realizing the consequence one is creating, or, seeing it and not really caring, being ‘ok’ with the consequence, so long as it is happening to another (not remembering we are One, and we are Equal, so creating consequence in the life of another is at the same time creating your own consequence, either directly and immediately, or indirectly and/or over time).

When you take a breath before you speak, you have a moment to clear yourself, to be self-honest, to see through your own manipulation and consider the Whole. You have a moment to bring in CARE, CONSIDERATION, RESPECT and REGARD for not only yourself, but for everyone your words might affect. You have this timeless moment to look to Self for Guidance. Your best Self. You Self that Stands as what is Best for All.

In this, there is at first an inner battle that takes place, as we have been taught through the education system, the money system and social systems to look out for ourselves, ensure our own survival at the sake of others, to be the one that climbs the ladder of success to provide for self and one’s own. There is very little consideration for ‘the other’, ‘them’, they are seen as the competition, and their diminishment is your gain. See how we live this out in our own minds in the small ways in our lives, how we do not see my success as your success, your happiness as my happiness. We have very much separated ourselves into ‘us’ vs ‘them’, ‘me’ vs ‘you’. This is so well-known that it is cliché, but have we ever really taken a look at how in actually live the correction?

Within this battle of the selves, when looking inside to one’s Best Self for guidance, what I have found is that in the beginning, when choosing the path of Best for All there is an immense fear. This fear is an indicator that one is in fact functioning according to principles, possibly for the first time. This is functioning without feeling, emoting or experiencing. The fear comes like a firewall as in one’s words and actions one is deliberately giving up self-interest, which has been linked to survival. One is deliberately NOT feeding one’s ego, which has been linked to survival. One is deliberately giving up ‘experience’ as personal wants and desires (see this blog for context: You Cannot Both Experience Life and Live Life), which has been linked to living and being alive.

However, everything that is being given up is based in survival and experience, instead of in Life, Living and Real Fulfillment in the physical, which is a slow, breath-by-breath creational process rooted in actual action taken over time. We have been living in fear and survival for so long now, that anything that does not align with this feels like it is going against our best interest, our living and our survival – and the feeling is strong, as it is in our programming, in our neuro-pathways, it is in our DNA – and changing this involves a deep and profound change that will challenge you on these levels of existence that have gone untouched for far too long. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use self-interest as my guide in what I do, how I think and what I say.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that feelings and emotions must guide me in order to ensure my survival and my enjoyment in this life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to pursue gain as my guide, where my thoughts, words and deeds are being guided by my wants and desires that benefit only me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to link feelings and emotions to survival.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to link ego to survival.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to link experience to living.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that I NEED to experience something in order to live, to feel alive.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have trusted a self I had built and created in self-interest, in unawareness, without consideration, honour, respect and regard for others, for the Whole, for the bigger picture and the long term.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to turn a blind eye to the direct link between living from a starting point of self-interest and the consequence I have seen in my life, not linking the two, but instead trusting in hope for some change or solution to present itself, instead of BEING the solution and the change for and as myself and so others.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize the importance of a clear starting point within and without, clearing the inner and the outer as Who I Am within myself and Who I Am in my reality.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to look to others for guidance, trusting them, and copying without discernment which means I have not taken complete self-responsibility, which can then lead to blame.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to use others as examples only, where I take the best of them and then look inside myself for how I can live those words as me, in my way within and as my expression, where only I can be my guide in the decisions and choices I make, the words I choose to speak and the actions I take.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear looking inside Self for guidance due to the self-responsibility this entails, where my mistakes and fuckups are my own, the consequences I may create are my own, where there is no backdoor of blame, where actual learning must be applied, lived and patterned into the deepest levels of myself, which is a process of patience, repetition, trust and time.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to guide myself towards actions that honour what is Best for All, but have instead fallen to fear and not wanting to give up my self-interest, looking for short-term gains as experience and not looking at the long-term creational process that involves the betterment of everyone.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to trust fear over Life.

I forgive myself that I have NOT accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that trusting Life is an active and not a passive process.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that trusting Life involves letting go of the old while birthing the new, and that this process can be painful from both angles.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want proof as ‘receiving’ before I give, believing within this that my giving is of no consequence, is unappreciated, is empty, instead of seeing and realizing the self-fulfillment I create when I give as an expression of myself, where the giving is at the same time receiving as I give to others as myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear pain both physical and emotional, to fear fear, and to fear death, instead of seeing and realizing that at this point these things are an inevitability to be faced, that they can be faced as they are not greater than Who I am as my expression, as Life, and so I decide to face them as a creational process or a destructive and diminishing process.

I commit myself to let go of the self as self-interest as fear, feelings, emotions and personal gain as my guide.

I commit myself to look inside mySELF for guidance, to the Self that stands, that knows, that sees what is Best for All and what is not.

 

 

 

 

Take a Breath Before You Speak (2)

 

continued from Take a Breath Before You Speak

I forgive myself that I have NOT accepted and allowed myself to give myself a moment, to take a breath before I speak in order to consider if my words are Best For All or only best for self.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to speak words that are tainted and contaminated by self-interest instead of taking a moment to consider what is Best For All and using that moment to drop my self-interest, face myself and speak from a starting point of the principles I have committed myself to in thought, word and deed.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed backchat, internal conversation and voices in the head to come through and contaminate my words, so that the words I speak from this starting point cannot be trusted by myself, by others or by Life.

I forgive myself that I have NOT shut down my backchat, internal conversations and voices in the head in one moment, but instead accept and allow them to play out as if they are relevant and important or necessary to ‘figure things out’, when in fact I have seen, realized and understood that the only conclusion they ever come to is personal gain or avoidance of pain and discomfort. Within this:

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to speak words that seek gain or avoid pain and discomfort at the sake of what’s Best For All, within seeing and understanding that the gain and the pain is only of the ego in self-interest, instead of believing in myself, trusting myself that I am able and capable of standing for Life, for All and not just ‘me’ and ‘how I feel’ without considering the impact and outflows on others in my life and the greater whole.

I forgive myself that I have not stopped backchat, internal conversations and self-talk.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to just be HERE, in the physical, with every moment being a new moment, where I speak and move and act based on what is Here in the moment.

Take a Breath before you speak…

Take a breath before you speak…

Take a breath before you speak.

I commit myself to take a breath before I speak.

I commit myself to slow down in my speaking.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not speak due to fear of speaking tainted words, wherein I accept and allow fear to be my directive principle instead of Self being the directive principle in which I would instead take a breath, assess my words and decide from there whether or not it is relevant for me to speak.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that ‘not speaking’ is in any way a solution, instead of seeing and realizing that it is in fact a polarity and spiteful to myself as simply ‘doing the opposite of what I have been doing’ as if some form of punishment will rectify having ever spoken tainted words that created consequence in my life.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to live and develop discernment, trusting that I can discern between What is Best For All and only what is best for me.

I commit myself to push through the resistances of speaking what is best for all as I know when I speak these words I am committing myself to the words I speak out loud for others to hear wherein there is an accountability in place, a cross-reference where I close my back doors and stick to my commitment.

I commit myself to honour what is Best for All in the words I speak, wherein I am left fulfilled, trustworthy, and with integrity, with respect for myself, others and Life.

 

 

Discernment and Diet, Honouring My Body: micro-blog from Desteni Universe

It started with setting out on a process to honour my physical body, and ended in me falling flat and almost dropping it all, wondering… “what happened?”

I had been hearing about and doing some research on ‘Intermittent Fasting’. It had been getting really good reviews from others, and at times when I’d tested it, I liked the result and how it made me feel physically, but I had never done it for more than a few days or a week.

At the same time, I was using an app to develop a better and more consistent routine for myself. The routine consisted of starting small, with habits like drinking water, eating a healthy breakfast and doing light exercise in the morning.

I found there to be some stress building around me trying to integrate these two different elements into my life, firstly because the information was conflicting. For example, one was saying I should eat a healthy breakfast, and the other was telling me to wait and only eat after the 16 hour fast was over. Where I would be having this dilemma that I should now be eating, but no! I should wait till the fast is over! And secondly, sometimes my body or my day was not suitable for the exercise to happen at the time it should, or the breakfast to be as it should due to time or missing ingredients, and I would start going into panic or judgment that now I am falling on my commitment!

In essence: in an attempt to honour my physical body physically, I was instead causing emotional stress and self-abuse through my own reactions to trying to do everything right and follow all the instructions!

What I realize was that, these plans that have fixed and rigid times and schedules are not taking into consideration the most important ingredient: ME, my body, my physical composition, my responsibilities, my process points I am facing, and everything that makes up my physical and mental life that I walk with every day.

My hormones fluctuate throughout the month with my menstrual cycle, and sometimes I am very hungry later in the evening, or if I don’t eat, I begin to shake and have a blood-sugar crash. While other times the thought of food repulses me in the mornings. Sometimes my mornings are calm and relaxed with little physical activity, and sometimes I have a very physically busy day. I have OCD and migraines that make frequent disruptions in my plans, structure and scheduling, as well as being located on a farm where visits to town are less frequent, and where there are people, animals and other responsibilities that impact my life in ways that can be unplanned and unpredictable.

This is just one small example of the conflicting information we can receive from experts, from science, from plans, articles or the most recent fads – in the sea of information we are quite literally bombarded with each day, which wants us to follow their instructions and their plans to a ‘T’, while not taking into consideration that every single human being has drastically different physical, mental and emotional realities to consider, and that the changes of needs and requirements for one person can also fluctuate quite drastically throughout the week or months.

I am working with how to place ‘me’ firmly WITHIN MYSELF first, as I slowly introduce, test out and integrate pieces of information, instead of placing me within the information, as if that ‘me’ is a little mysterious black box that ‘should’ respond to the application of information exactly as it depicts.

In this way, I am using the information as tools to get to know me/myself/my body better: what do I need right now and what information would be the most supportive to apply? What are my requirements and how do they change over the course of the month? Which tool can I bring in for these days or couple of days that would support me best in these moments? In order to be able to discern which information would be of best support for me in the moment, I must first have an effective awareness and communication with my own body, and using the information as ‘tools’ in my life can assist and support in my process of developing that.

So, it’s a getting-to-know the information, getting-to-know me, and getting-to-know how the information integrates into me and my life in order to be able to discern what information to apply in my life and when.

If you’re curious, what I’ve found out is that for about two weeks a month, it is usually best to drop the intermittent fasting (before, during and a bit after menstruation). During menstruation I basically give my body what it wants, more sleep, and I place less importance on the exercise in the mornings and just make sure I move throughout the day a bit. I can be more disciplined for the other two weeks. I do drink the water every day, and will eat in the mornings usually 1-2 hours after waking up unless I wake up hungry. If I feel a migraine coming, that takes priority where rest, low stimulation, consistent food and water is what I need, and then with OCD, the best thing is for me to bring in the discipline and instruction-following – There is no plan on earth out there that is developed for this specific set of parameters. I have done this for me, and in the end, using my discernment when it comes to information has been the answer I was looking for in terms of how to honour my physical body, while taking into consideration that I am more that just a body, I am a mind, a beingness, and a person that lives in a specific environment at a specific time in my life.

Discernment
Dis-earn-meant
Dis - dissecting the information
Earn – Earning the solution/answer through doing the work
Meant – ‘intention’, doing it with intention/being clear on what I intent to achieve, what I mean to do.

For some VERY supportive insights into this topic, have a listen to: https://eqafe.com/p/losing-yourself-in-the-information-age-back-to-basics

Consider subscribing to the EQAFE Unlimited plan for unlimited access to EQAFE recordings for 30 euros a month at www.eqafe.com.