Look Inside to Self for Guidance

“Look inside to Self for guidance” follows “be silent always – take a breath before you speak”.  Please read the following blogs for context:

Be Silent Always (When is Silence Real?) 

Be Silent Always (2)

 Take a Breath Before You Speak 

Take a Breath Before You Speak (2) 

 

When you look inside to SELF for guidance, which ‘Self’ are you looking to? The self-interested self, or the Self that stands within responsibility, that stands within principle, within integrity, within respect, the one that stands as what is Best for All?

Can you stand as the Tree of Life that gives unconditionally, expecting nothing in return?

Can you stand as responsibility, taking SELF-responsibility and taking responsibility for your environment as an extension of yourself?  Responsibility leaves no time for self-interest.

Can you give as you would like to receive, without first receiving?

It is vitally important to first learn how to be silent always – because as soon as your mind becomes busy, you are already in self-interest. Within this, you cannot trust yourSELF to guide you, because you are living as a ‘self’ that is out for its own gain. This means that anything that comes from this self will be a manipulation, seeking profits and avoiding losses. Seeking positive experience and avoiding negative experience. Within this, self disregards everything in one’s reality as ‘self’ becomes the center of the universe, not seeing and realizing the consequence one is creating, or, seeing it and not really caring, being ‘ok’ with the consequence, so long as it is happening to another (not remembering we are One, and we are Equal, so creating consequence in the life of another is at the same time creating your own consequence, either directly and immediately, or indirectly and/or over time).

When you take a breath before you speak, you have a moment to clear yourself, to be self-honest, to see through your own manipulation and consider the Whole. You have a moment to bring in CARE, CONSIDERATION, RESPECT and REGARD for not only yourself, but for everyone your words might affect. You have this timeless moment to look to Self for Guidance. Your best Self. You Self that Stands as what is Best for All.

In this, there is at first an inner battle that takes place, as we have been taught through the education system, the money system and social systems to look out for ourselves, ensure our own survival at the sake of others, to be the one that climbs the ladder of success to provide for self and one’s own. There is very little consideration for ‘the other’, ‘them’, they are seen as the competition, and their diminishment is your gain. See how we live this out in our own minds in the small ways in our lives, how we do not see my success as your success, your happiness as my happiness. We have very much separated ourselves into ‘us’ vs ‘them’, ‘me’ vs ‘you’. This is so well-known that it is cliché, but have we ever really taken a look at how in actually live the correction?

Within this battle of the selves, when looking inside to one’s Best Self for guidance, what I have found is that in the beginning, when choosing the path of Best for All there is an immense fear. This fear is an indicator that one is in fact functioning according to principles, possibly for the first time. This is functioning without feeling, emoting or experiencing. The fear comes like a firewall as in one’s words and actions one is deliberately giving up self-interest, which has been linked to survival. One is deliberately NOT feeding one’s ego, which has been linked to survival. One is deliberately giving up ‘experience’ as personal wants and desires (see this blog for context: You Cannot Both Experience Life and Live Life), which has been linked to living and being alive.

However, everything that is being given up is based in survival and experience, instead of in Life, Living and Real Fulfillment in the physical, which is a slow, breath-by-breath creational process rooted in actual action taken over time. We have been living in fear and survival for so long now, that anything that does not align with this feels like it is going against our best interest, our living and our survival – and the feeling is strong, as it is in our programming, in our neuro-pathways, it is in our DNA – and changing this involves a deep and profound change that will challenge you on these levels of existence that have gone untouched for far too long. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use self-interest as my guide in what I do, how I think and what I say.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that feelings and emotions must guide me in order to ensure my survival and my enjoyment in this life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to pursue gain as my guide, where my thoughts, words and deeds are being guided by my wants and desires that benefit only me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to link feelings and emotions to survival.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to link ego to survival.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to link experience to living.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that I NEED to experience something in order to live, to feel alive.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have trusted a self I had built and created in self-interest, in unawareness, without consideration, honour, respect and regard for others, for the Whole, for the bigger picture and the long term.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to turn a blind eye to the direct link between living from a starting point of self-interest and the consequence I have seen in my life, not linking the two, but instead trusting in hope for some change or solution to present itself, instead of BEING the solution and the change for and as myself and so others.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize the importance of a clear starting point within and without, clearing the inner and the outer as Who I Am within myself and Who I Am in my reality.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to look to others for guidance, trusting them, and copying without discernment which means I have not taken complete self-responsibility, which can then lead to blame.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to use others as examples only, where I take the best of them and then look inside myself for how I can live those words as me, in my way within and as my expression, where only I can be my guide in the decisions and choices I make, the words I choose to speak and the actions I take.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear looking inside Self for guidance due to the self-responsibility this entails, where my mistakes and fuckups are my own, the consequences I may create are my own, where there is no backdoor of blame, where actual learning must be applied, lived and patterned into the deepest levels of myself, which is a process of patience, repetition, trust and time.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to guide myself towards actions that honour what is Best for All, but have instead fallen to fear and not wanting to give up my self-interest, looking for short-term gains as experience and not looking at the long-term creational process that involves the betterment of everyone.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to trust fear over Life.

I forgive myself that I have NOT accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that trusting Life is an active and not a passive process.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that trusting Life involves letting go of the old while birthing the new, and that this process can be painful from both angles.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want proof as ‘receiving’ before I give, believing within this that my giving is of no consequence, is unappreciated, is empty, instead of seeing and realizing the self-fulfillment I create when I give as an expression of myself, where the giving is at the same time receiving as I give to others as myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear pain both physical and emotional, to fear fear, and to fear death, instead of seeing and realizing that at this point these things are an inevitability to be faced, that they can be faced as they are not greater than Who I am as my expression, as Life, and so I decide to face them as a creational process or a destructive and diminishing process.

I commit myself to let go of the self as self-interest as fear, feelings, emotions and personal gain as my guide.

I commit myself to look inside mySELF for guidance, to the Self that stands, that knows, that sees what is Best for All and what is not.

 

 

 

 

Why Do I Accept a System of Crime?

Because I accept and allow the fact that I have more than others, and I know that this is unfair. I realize that what I have and my position in the world is a result of living in a system of inequality, where I out of sheer luck, ended up being born into the group called the ‘haves’, where I spent my life not challenging this because I was born into it and accepted it as simply ‘the way things are’.

Because of and due to my acceptance and allowance of a system of inequality, I have accepted and allowed that abject poverty, starvation, survival, lack and innumerable forms of suffering are ok to exist. 

Within this I have accepted and allowed myself to fear these atrocities, and so fear that lack, starvation, poverty and innumerable forms of suffering may occur to me - a fear which keeps me in my place and in line and paralyzed from speaking up or disrupting the system and my place within it.

Because I accept and allow self-interest, where I am fully human and deserving, and where ‘criminals’ exist only as a picture in my mind and so I do not have to consider them as fully human, equals in Life, where they exist as figments of my imagination.

Because I have accepted and allowed myself to become addicted to consumerism, possessed by possessions because I have accepted and allowed ‘what I have’ to determine ‘how I feel’ in terms of things like survival, security, self-image, self-worth etc… and within this have accepted and allowed a fear of loss, fear of losing myself, my things, my money, and so want to protect it, hoard it, keep others out and away, even when I know there is no system of support for them to go to.

Because I have separated myself from others with the thought that ‘it is happening to them’ and not me, and feeling relieved.

Because I’ve abdicated responsibility to governments, police and other systems to ‘take care of crime’, where if it is not happening directly to me, I don’t have to look at it.

Because I accept and allow myself to judge myself, and then punish myself in my mind, thus accepting and allowing a system of judgment/punishment within, and so as a result, equally accepting and allowing it without.

Because I have accepted and allowed myself to participate within and as the ‘me versus them’ game, where ‘I am good’ because I do not ‘commit crime’ (as defined by the system), and ‘they are bad’ because they ‘commit crime’ (as defined by the system), instead of seeing and realizing that I AM them, seeing ‘them’ as reflections of those parts of me I have suppressed, not faced, and showing me the crimes of our combined acceptances and allowances in this world.

Because I have accepted and allowed jealousy, greed, envy and spite within and as me, where I want what others have, and where I’ve accepted and allowed disempowerment within myself and in relation to the world systems of money, jobs and consumerism, thinking and believing I am powerless to better myself and my life, and so I will instead take from others, acting within spite of others because they have what I want and so I spite them, make them less, and take what they have despite the fact that  would not want this to happen to me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to sit and hope that ‘crime does not happen to me’, sitting in fear of crime, holding my breath in a way, while I accept and allow crime to exist without questioning why or what can be done.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to subscribe to a system of absolute inequality unquestioningly, where my mind exists in a small box of what is acceptable and allowable, where I never dared to peek outside that box and ask questions, or opened my mindset enough to consider that there can be another way, that solutions and change are possible.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed a system of inequality, abject poverty, starvation, lack, survival and innumerable forms of suffering to exist within the thought that “it is ok so long as it is not happening to me” and that “I am ok to just sit here and fear it” instead of taking a stand within myself that this is not an acceptable way to live life on this earth and that I will not allow the acceptance of this within me and as me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to sit and fear the atrocities of the world, fearing lack, starvation, poverty and innumerable forms of suffering, fearing that they may occur to me, a fear which keeps me in place and in line, which paralyzes me from speaking up or disrupting the order of things for fear of losing my privileged place within it, where I don’t dare go there, not even in my mind, not even opening up the possibility of another way in my mind, showing I have been mind-controlled.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in self-interest, where I, in my mind, am fully human and so deserving, whereas those I perceive to be ‘criminals’ or ‘victims of crime’ exist only as a picture, a figment of my imagination and so I do not have to consider them as fully human, equals in Life, and can drop them from my mind as easily as I can drop or change a picture in my mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be and become addicted to consumerism, possessed by my possessions, where I have accepted and allowed ‘what I have’ to determine ‘who I am’ and ‘how I feel’ in terms of and in relation to things like survival, security, self-image and self-worth etc… where within this, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear loss, fear losing myself, to fear losing my things, to fear losing my money, and so I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to protect myself, my things and my stuff, to keep others ‘out’ and ‘away’, even though I know very well there is no system of support in place for them, for those less fortunate to turn to as the world turns away and we collectively turned our backs on them.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from others, and react in ‘relief’ when I see that bad things are happening to them, and not me, even though if I were in their position, I would want someone to consider me, to support me, to help me out till I get on my feet, and within this, I forgive myself that I have not done unto others as I would like have done unto me, but have instead closed myself off, closed my mind as consideration, closed all the doors and locked myself into my castle of fear – much like how it play out on earth is how I exist in my mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to abdicate responsibility to the government, police, and other systems, for them to take care of the ‘crime problem’, the ‘crime problem’ that we have all collectively accepted and allowed, but when we do not have to deal with it directly, we do not have to look at it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give my power away to governments, where they can use my power to fuel their own corruption, or be burdened by my power, where they truly want to do something about the situation but simply cannot take it on alone without the participation of the masses, and so they get the life sucked out of them, as I sit in fear in my apparent comfort and security of ‘having enough to survive’.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to abdicate responsibility to the police to please ‘take care of crime’, where they risk their lives and kill others due to this entire system that we have collectively allowed, where ‘criminals versus police’ creates a life of fear, misery, stress, anxiety, death and insecurity for the individuals directly involved and their families, where they confront reality more directly for all of us, and so we herald the police as heroes because they are standing in a position we do not want to stand in, see, look at or know about, so we honour them and give them medals, punish and judge the others for a sense of justice being done, when in fact we are actually honouring the system, justifying the system, keeping the system in place, and the front-line place keepers for not rocking the boat, because then we all know we would have to look, have to confront it, within ourselves and without.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed a system of ‘crime and punishment’ to exist within and as me, where I constantly judge myself in my mind, and constantly punish myself and beat myself up in my  mind, so that when I see judgment and punishment happening outside of me and in the world, I think ‘yes, I am not the only one, others must also suffer, be judged and punished like me’, and so feel a bit better when I see judgments being made and apparent ‘justice’ taking place as punishment, instead of stopping judging, coming to an understanding, and changing the circumstances that cause the problems in the first place.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate within and as the ’me’ versus ‘them’  game, where I judge myself as ‘good’ because I apparently do not commit ‘crime’ (as defined by the system), and ‘they are bad’ because they commit ‘crime’ (as define by the system), instead of seeing and realizing that I AM ‘them’, and seeing and realizing ‘them’ as reflections of me and those parts of myself within me that I have suppressed, not faced, where ‘they’ (us/we) are simply showing ‘us’ (ourselves collectively) the result and consequences of our collective acceptances and allowances in this world.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed greed, jealousy, envy and spite to exist within and as me, wanting what others have, and instead of empowering myself to make the best life for myself and everyone else – where everyone can have what they want and need, instead go into disempowerment within myself and in relation to the world systems of money, jobs, consumerism etc… thinking and believing I am powerless, and so I would consider taking from others, acting within spite towards others because they have what I want and I can’t otherwise get it, in this, diminishing them in my mind conveniently so that taking from them does not seem so bad, even though I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that I would not want this to be done unto me, instead of living the statement and principle of doing unto others as you would have them do unto you, where I would rather have us all working on a system of support, to support each one in their lives and livelihoods.

I commit myself to break down my walls of fear, to let Life in and let myself out into the world and reality, where I commit myself to dedicate myself to a process of change, to assist and support anyone who decides to do the same, and receive assistance and support when I need it, to change in thought, word and deed to an actual creator that contributes to the creation of a world that's Best for All.

Day 248 - Changing the World with Earth Haven

This is what it looks like to change the world with the Earth Haven pilot project for sustainable living. It is not glamorous, there is no fanfare. It is dirty and it is hard work, literally moving the earth as we move rocks and soil. Quietly working day by day as we build from the ground up.
I am satisfied with my work here today - I have raked half of the gravel and my body is feeling it!




The project I am currently working on is the creation of an enclosed fruit tree forest. It is enclosed to protect it from being ravished by nature without using harmful chemicals.



We already have two more forests which are outdoors and available to all animals and insects. We planted those first because the animals and insects are in greater need, due to the destruction of their habitat and food-sources caused by farming for human consumption only.
We are in the process of rehabilitating this land to invite Life back into it, creating a space to show what the Living Environment can do when it is supported instead of exploited.
Today's work involved raking hundreds of pounds of gravel into piles to be removed and later replaced by the 'Back to Eden' planting method which we have already tested out elsewhere. Afterwards, fruit trees will be planted and maintained and, in addition to our other two forests, should provide more than enough fruit for the many people that will come to work, live, learn and grow.

Our current location is South Africa, where we are surrounded by informal settlements inhabited by people that cannot afford the basics, such as fresh fruit and a balanced diet. We intend to provide much more than that, and we are already on our way.



It feels really good to get out and be physical, especially knowing that what I am doing will assist and support so many people to come, and people that we will reach out to where they live.

After having worked in an office for years, I am loving the transition from staplers and file folders to steel rakes and wheelbarrows! I even took my first selfie with a rake, and got a blister on my hands from hours of raking, enjoying every moment of experiencing the feeling of the tools on my skin without gloves.

If you would like to co-create this project with us, visit www.patreon.com/earthhaven.

Day 240: Why I Joined Earth Haven

I have found, throughout all of my 36 years of life, that there is very little that is actually ‘real’ in this world, and this ranges from people, to products, to organizations and beyond. If it exists within the current profit-based system, then it has usually sold out somewhere to allow for the continuation of a bottom line. And that disappointing moment of realization I get when I see the bigger picture, see beyond the presented image and in to the truth of a thing, is a moment I was getting tired of constantly experiencing. And this is where Earth Haven comes in.

The more I learned about Earth Haven and the principles on which it is founded, the more my ears perked up! The founder, Gian Robberts, would see right through the surface dimensions of many of the solutions offered today, and cut to the meat and bone of whether it is truly considering the whole. He could always find that compromise for the bottom line, that one or two things that discredits the entire solution by making it unsustainable. I liked this, but I mostly liked the fact that he didn’t stop there, he kept looking until he found a solution that he could use, a real solution, and he would implement that.

What I also noticed and like about Earth Haven, is that it leaves no stone unturned, so to speak, when it comes to who or what Earth Haven supports.  Earth Haven takes into consideration not only sustainable food growing methods, but also supporting the land and animals around the gardens. Not only that, the people are taken into consideration as well, not just feeding people, but educating and empowering people. There is often something that is overlooked when an organization pushes for a cause – whether it be the people and the personal self-change that is required to make a real difference, or the insects, soil and animals that are not directly related to food-production, but rather either disregarded or considered ‘pests’ that are invading our space and our land. Earth Haven considers and provides for all of these things, a truly holistic approach, which is really the only way it can be!

We can’t be at war with a certain ‘destructive’ insect when in fact it has every right to be here and exist as we do, based on the principle of honouring ALL life. If we did that, we would not be functioning from a starting point of principle, and we would only be another disappointment. Instead, we work WITH everything that is here, and so our eco-tunnel, growing methods, what we plant and where – is all done in awareness of what is present in the environment and how we can work with it.

Earth Haven has also hacked the problem of conditional funding. This is where funders make a list of conditions to which organizations must adhere to in order to receive the funding. Oftentimes organizations will bend their own rules and disregard certain principles in order to receive the funding they need. Earth Haven has hacked this problem through crowd funding and slow and steady growth. There is constant pressure due to the vastness of our vision and the sheer amount of work that must be done, but there is no rushing. We do what we can with what we have and no more. We do not create a situation where we are at the mercy of funders, because we will not compromise for money.

I lastly wanted to mention the part of the Earth Haven vision that involves spreading, acting like a heart pumping resources and education out into the world. Many organizations become too insulated, isolated and separated from the whole. Earth Haven is founded on the point of sharing openly and expanding to include anyone and everyone that is willing to move with us. It is important to move within and as principle, which is what I am currently busy learning more and more, but where there is a will, there is a way to work together in honouring and supporting all life equally.

This is just to list a few reasons why I saw Earth Haven as the organization I wanted to work with. I followed, shared and supported online for a long time. Then, I took a look at my life and asked myself if this was what I really wanted? I decided that ‘no’, I wanted more. I wanted to be directly involved, and I saw that I was willing to give up many of my life’s luxuries in order to be able to do so. It is more important for me to push for solutions in this world in it’s current state, than it was for me to build a life of comfort and security. It took me 4 years to get my life in order, to a place where I could leave it comfortably, leaving no unfinished business, and with enough to support myself while I am here.

Will I one day regret this? I highly doubt it. Working with Earth Haven is the most fulfilling work I have ever done, and I intend to see it through because if you ever get the chance to visit here, you will see a place that is exploding with potential! And this potential is being brought through into the creation process and becoming real, tangible solutions, but as we all know, the creation process takes time, and cannot be rushed.

I truly believe Earth Haven is going to be big, and is going to be great. And this is not simply an ungrounded belief based in desire, but a belief in myself, in Gian, and in everybody that is pushing this project, because I know we will do whatever it takes to move one of the first and only REAL projects of change in this world, and we will see the fruition and the realization of Earth Haven’s potential, as it will represent all of our living potential.

Thank you.

Become a patron: www.patreon.com/earthhaven

Get to know us: https://www.facebook.com/EarthHavenMission/