Thursday, August 9, 2012

Day 66- Postponement Character (Self-commitments)

What follows is a series of self-commitment statements and self-corrective applications to assist and support me to stop participating within and as the characterization of ‘postponement.’ This is a character which I describe Here, and self-forgive Here and Here. Postponement has become a force to reckon with within my life, as I’m sure many can relate. The characters we play all stem from a single fear. Once I have forgiven this character, written a self-corrective script, and committed to my self-change, I will identify the singular fear from which I created this entire character. That information is still however, hidden deep beneath the layers I am now pulling up. So, when I have cleared myself, I will reveal the fear so that I may forgive it too, and face it.

Backchat (self-talk)

I commit myself to identify all backchat when and as it comes up, call it out and breathe through the reactions it creates within and as me.

When and as I see that I am back-chatting in my mind I stop, and I breathe. I call myself out on the backchat within the understanding that I am talking myself out of doing a task, which is an automated program I have accepted and allowed myself to design and live out for most of my life, which I no longer accept or allow to exist within and as me. I thus push myself to walk through the discomfort by becoming one with it and equal to the discomfort of pushing myself and changing as it to finally end it and live instead from breath to breath with no reactions.

Creating a resistance:

I commit myself to observe and eventually stop myself from charging thoughts of the task at hand with negative energy because of and through the back chat I participate within and as in relation to the task which I am resisting doing.

I commit myself to see myself, and the reality of myself and what I am doing to myself when I live within and as unawareness wherein I simply just react and allow myself to be directed by my reactions and how I feel inside, instead of investigating why it is that I actually feel that way, and seeing, realizing and understanding the simplicity of being able to STOP within that self-understanding.

When and as I see that I am charging thoughts of performing a task with negative energy, thus building resistance, I stop, and I breathe. I bring myself back to awareness and the simplicity of breath by understanding that I am busy making something harder than it actually is, and that so long as I see what I am doing, I can stop in one moment, before it gets too hard, and before I create a mountain out of a molehill.

I commit myself to stop participating in back chat to the point of allowing it to affect and direct me.

I commit myself to see through back chat and take my power back by stopping my participation within and as back chat, or walking through the manifested consequence when and as I let myself go too far.

When and as I see that I have accepted and allowed myself to go too far into the mind by following, feeding and participating within and as backchat until I have manifested myself as the actual experience of my thoughts I stop, and I breathe. I allow myself to embrace myself as the experience completely, within reminding myself that I can stop, and that there is another way and that I am committed to stopping the thoughts and backchat that limit, suppress and sabotage me so that I can walk breath by breath, one and equal, self-directive Here.

The polarity of Good and Evil:

I commit myself to stop myself from participating within and as positive and negative polarities wherein I have split the world into ‘likes’ and dislikes’ wherein I spend half the time pursuing the ‘good’ and the other half avoiding the ‘bad’ thus spending the entire time not directing myself according to what actually needs to get done or what is actually beneficial to me and best for all.

When and as I see that I have charged/am charging a task with negative energy (thus creating a resistance and not wanting to do it), I stop, and I breathe. I bring myself back to stability by becoming one with and equal to the energetic experience I created so that, instead of resisting and trying/attempting to avoid it, I embrace it and face it and move myself to stand up from within it. Ideally I will stop this experience before it starts, but I see that I am still accepting and allowing myself to create this experience for myself and thus within this self-corrective application I direct myself to move from within the experience I created so that it no longer directs and controls me.

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