Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Day 42 - Nothing is Looming


This is a continuation of yesterday's self-forgiveness statements on the point of experiencing a feeling of 'looming,' like 'impending doom,' that causes me fear and stress.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to fear the future/my future.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed fear of the future to exist within and as me.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to project survival-based thoughts into the future and then created and manifested fear of the future based on my own self-created projection of the future.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to fear not having enough money in the future or now.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to fear going into debt/unavoidable debt in the future.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to fear not being in control of the future.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to desire to control the future.

I forgive myself that I’ve NOT accepted and allowed myself to to simply walk in self-trust and self-honesty into the unknown of the future.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to think or believe that I need to have a set plan for the future in order to be able to function in the present.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to create a stress/fear/looming experience within and as me because of all the fears I have created about the future, because of my desire to control the future, and because of my belief that I require a set plan in order to experience a stability within and as me in the present.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to think or believe that how I experience myself right now has got anything to do with the future, instead of realizing that all that exists right now is the present, so any future-based projection that I am reacting to internally in the present moment are only but projections which I create and am entirely responsible for, thus I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to fear and stress out over/about my own fear.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to feel insecure within myself, and a looming sensation because my plans for the future changed, and now I have to make new plans.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to fear being entirely self-responsible for myself and my life and the path I choose.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to think or believe that I can do more more more right now in order to secure my future, instead of realizing that walking within and through life towards stability and self-responsible living which will lead to a stable self that can manage to stabilize within any situation, is a process that takes time and cannot be rushed and cannot all be done now in order to get it over with and then sit back and relax in the future. Instead, I allow myself to relax in the present moment, to take time for myself, but to also apply myself without stress, fear or looming, within the understanding that when and as I take each step within self-honesty and self-responsibility, using the tools of self-forgiveness and self-corrective application, that I am walking towards a stable, whol and complete self that can stand and direct in any situation, without following the unnecessary internal energetic experiences of stress, fear or a looming/impending doom sensation, as these experiences are destructive and do not serve me in anyway, thus I take a step here towards stopping my participation within and as them.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to continue to react to old habits and patterns of not taking responsibility and thus constantly experiencing consequences.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to react to and participate within the memories of having my life be directed by consequences or attempting to avoid consequences.

I accept and allow myself to stop participating in these patterns , and I understand, realize and see that over time they will dissipate and crumble away because they are/were not real and thus I have the power to create AND destroy them by stopping feeding them with my attention as energy and participation.

I commit myself to walking out of the past and in to the present moment bystopping feeding my thoughts and memories of the past as reactions in the present.

When and as I see that I am reacting to past memories, habitsand patterns within and as an energetic emotional or feeling experience within me, I stop and I breathe. I bring myself back to awareness, back to the present moment by reminding myself that reacting to such past habits, patterns and memories is only keeping them alive to continue directing me and my life, and each time I stop my participation within and as them, I take a little bit more of myself back, in order that I my walk as a complete whole Here.

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